What Are the Typical Characteristics of High-Conflict Child Custody and Divorce Cases?

Few things are as complicated and emotionally draining in family law matters as divorce cases and child custody disputes. Even within these legal surroundings, some divorce and child custody cases are more complicated and have more conflict than others. It is wisest to avoid high-conflict legal matters with a family member or spouse, as things can quickly become more expensive, difficult, and take longer. However, sometimes conflict is unavoidable, particularly in family law cases involving allegations of domestic violence, neglect, or substance abuse.

Common characteristics of high-conflict custody cases include the following:

• Adverse effects on a child’s well-being, which can result in stress and anxiety
• Allegations of domestic abuse, substance abuse, abandonment, or child neglect
• Attempting to poison the child against the other parent by bad-mouthing the parent in the child’s presence
• Breakdowns in communication between both parents
• Constant disagreements over parenting time and who has decision-making authority
• Drawn out legal battles
• Emotional intensity
• High levels of hostility between the parents
• Involvement of professionals, such as Child Protective Services workers, parenting coordinators, or a guard at litem
• Intense and ongoing litigation in a courtroom setting
• Lack of cooperation between parents and a co-parenting agreement
• Mental health issues in one or both interested parties, including narcissistic personality disorder
• The inability or unwillingness to cooperate and decision making
• The involvement of a family law court
• The need for repeated court intervention to resolve conflict

While not all these factors need to be present for a case to be considered high conflict, multiple such factors strongly suggest a high intensity and conflict that can make the child custody case difficult to resolve. Another factor that often figures in child custody cases of a high conflict variety is a lack of focus on the best interests of the child. While parents understandably look after their interests, they must always put the child’s interests first. Parents prioritizing their child’s needs tend to resolve child custody cases more easily.

Who is Your Support Team?

When you are going through a high-conflict child custody case, it is important to remember that you needn’t go through the process alone. Several professionals and family members can rally around your cause to support you throughout the process and make things easier for you and your family.

Mental health professionals play a critical role in managing high-conflict divorces and child custody cases. An intervention organized by a therapist or other mental health professional can help with relationship building, problem-solving, and more, thus helping parents find healthy ways to relate to each other and their children. If you have not done so, consider the benefits of entering therapy to help you through your child custody case.

Group therapy may also be a method of support worth considering when going through high-conflict family law cases. Learning from others can be a good way to navigate similar situations and may also help you feel less isolated during your legal matters.

What Are Common High-Conflict Custody Resolutions?

High-conflict child custody cases in North Carolina are immensely stressful for everyone involved, but especially for the children at the heart of the legal matter. Your children are deeply sensitive to conflict between you and the other parent and are likely to suffer poor mental health during a high-conflict custody case. Some of the signs of stress affecting children in high-conflict cases include depression, anxiety, trouble sleeping, difficulty concentrating, behavioral challenges, academic challenges, obsessive worrying, and age regression.

Thankfully, several potential strategies exist for resolving high-conflict cases and child custody disputes. If you are involved in a high-conflict custody case, it is important that you consider the many methods for resolving your legal issues and get the support you need throughout the process.

Consider these recommendations when going through a high-conflict custody case:

• Always focus on your children’s best interests
• Avoid emotional language and do not respond to provocations
• Consider arbitration or mediation
• Demonstrate your ability to be stable and reliable
• Dismiss all-or-nothing thinking
• Do not attempt to poison the child against the other parent
• Document everything
• Enter counseling
• Explore the potential of a collaborative divorce
• Follow all court orders
• Hire a family law attorney who is experienced in high-conflict child custody cases
• Keep lines of communication open between you and the child’s other parent
• Prioritize self-care
• Remain calm and respectful
• Stay off social media
• Use a co-parenting communication app
• Use a parenting coordinator

What is Mediation?

Mediation is an alternative dispute resolution method that can be invaluable for resolving child custody disputes outside of the courtroom setting. In mediation, a neutral third party (the mediator) helps facilitate ongoing discussions to assist the parents in reaching common ground on legal matters related to their child custody case.

Should You Consider Arbitration to Resolve Your Child Custody Disputes?

While mediation allows parents to actively make decisions together regarding child custody and visitation, arbitration requires the input of an objective third party, the arbitrator. In most cases, the third party’s decisions are rarely final, as parents can later resolve ongoing issues in a family law court.

What is a Parenting Coordinator or Consultant?

A parent coordinator (PC) is a neutral mental health professional or legal professional with experience handling mediation and family law cases. Parenting coordinators educate the parents on the children’s needs and help them find ways to meet those needs. It may be effective to consider hiring parent coordinators if you and the other parent have difficulty communicating about the welfare of your children, have complex child-related issues, and cannot agree on substantive issues.

What Happens if Your Child Custody Dispute Goes to Trial?

Litigation and a family law case should be your last resort. You should only consider turning to litigation and taking your case to trial if all other efforts have failed to reach an arrangement in a child custody matter.

The primary legal consideration in any child custody trial is to determine what the court believes is in the child’s best interest. So long as the family law judge follows this guiding principle, they have wide discretion when determining a child custody order.

Child custody disputes in court tend to be more costly, emotionally difficult, and take longer to resolve. Ultimately, the decisions are out of your hands and now in the hands of the judge, which can rob you of any sense of agency. If you are going to court to resolve your child custody dispute, it is highly recommended that you retain professional legal representation from an experienced family law attorney.

Schedule Your Initial Consultation with Our Compassionate Child Custody Attorneys Today

Even in the most amicable of circumstances, child custody cases are often highly emotional and legally complicated. Things can become even more complex when involved in a child custody dispute between high-conflict parties.

If you are involved in a child custody dispute and things have gotten intense between you and the other parent, we strongly advise you to retain professional legal counsel. Our legal team has years of experience representing clients in high-conflict family law cases, and we would be proud to represent your interests as you seek a satisfactory outcome to your case.

To learn more about our legal services and how we may assist you during this difficult time, please contact our North Carolina law firm to schedule a case review today. You can reach us at 336-770-2017.